Roots and Wings
by Storywriter55
Summary: Christmas Eve in the Ellis-Caffrey household is a bittersweet affair as they remember a loved one and prepare to send Hope off into the world


_Christmas Eve in the Ellis-Caffrey household is a bittersweet affair as they remember a loved one and prepare to send Hope off into the world_

**Roots and Wings**

Another Christmas in their home, Neal thought nostalgically as he finished getting dressed. But this one was a little different – bittersweet... He walked by Liam's room – no surprise there, the door was closed; he was still asleep. After all, it was only 10:30 on Christmas Eve – what else is a 14 year old boy going to do when he's finally off school for a few days. He glanced into Hope's room. She had started packing and there were clothes all over her bed and boxes strewn here and there. But Hope was nowhere in sight. Neal made his way to the staircase and started down slowly, wondering why it was so quiet in the house. He thought Sara would have a made a start on Christmas Eve dinner... As he took the last few steps, he spotted Raffie on the couch with his head on Hope's lap. Raffie was not allowed on the couch and he knew it so he gave Neal a nervous glance but seeing there was no reaction, he proceeded to set his head back down.

Raphael had arrived in the Caffrey family six years before. Satchmo had passed away that fall and Hope had been inconsolable. Neal and Sara figured that their household was already chaotic enough with two busy kids, two careers and everybody's extracurricular activities; what difference would it make to throw a dog into the mix. Raffie was a beautiful blend of Golden Retriever and Husky which meant he was as strong as an ox and a very busy boy. He was now seven years old so he had begun to settle a little but he still required two good walks a day to keep him from going totally bonkers.

Hope looked up as she saw her dad come into view. He thought her eyes looked a little misty so he made his way into the living room.

'Hey, where's Mom?' he asked as he sat beside her on the couch

'She and Aunt Emily went out for a few last minute groceries. I swear, Dad, it's like we're having 50 people over for dinner instead of 12'

'Ah, you know your mom, leave nothing to chance' Neal answered 'so... Little Bear's Christmas, huh?' he added as he glanced at the book in her lap

'Would you believe, it's still my favorite after all these years' said Hope as she slipped under Neal arm and moved a little closer

'Well, that was your very first Christmas book - and he is awfully cute...' said Neal

The large wicker basket full of Christmas books sat at their feet and Neal marvelled, once again at Sara's forethought when it came to creating new traditions for their family. He had not had much of a childhood, certainly not one that he had fond memories of, and he loved the fact that Sara had worked so hard over the years to ensure that their kids had a truckload of happy memories. Every year since Hope was born, Sara gave each of the kids a Christmas book. Over the years, they had accumulated a large basketful that was lugged out every Christmastime for everyone to enjoy. Both Hope and Liam still asked for a book each year – as if they needed to ask – and they would sit and look at them again and again and re-read Sara and Neal special dedication which was always on the front page of each book.

'I'm going to miss being in the house at Christmastime' said Hope as she put her head on Neal's shoulder.

'What are you talking about? You'll be back every year at Christmas!' Neal said, trying to downplay his own mixed feelings about his daughter leaving for university.

'Yeah, but you know, the tension building for weeks, Mom getting more and more excited, packages arriving mysteriously at the house, that whole buildup that starts at Thanksgiving – I won't be here for that' she added wistfully

'So, how _do_ you feel about moving to Pittsburgh?' asked Neal

'Really Dad? Excited, nervous, happy, sad, eager, scared... Need I go on?'

'Well, Carnegie Mellon does have one of the best Fine Arts programs in the country...'

'...and I'm so grateful to you and Mom for making this happen for me.'

'But?...' Neal asked

'No, but, Dad, just thanks for everything!' Hope said as she hugged him

Neal squeezed her close and fought off a tear. The last thing he wanted to do was make Hope feel guilty about leaving. She had a right to follow her dream. She had amazing instincts as an artist and she just needed some formal training to send her on her way. Neal was happy he had instilled this love of the arts in his daughter and he couldn't have been prouder when she was accepted into the program.

'You know, sweet pea, I remember your first day of school. I found you staring at that goofy picture of us playing Twister at Uncle Peter's – you know, the one that still sits on your dresser. You told me you were excited about going to school but you were scared of missing your mom and me'

'Oh yeah?' said Hope, smiling 'I don't remember. So, what words of advice did you give me back then?'

'I just suggested you bring something of your mom's and mine to make you feel secure and that I would pick you up at lunch' said Neal

'Sage advice, Dad' said Hope, looking up at Neal with her bright blue eyes

They were interrupted by the front door opening as Sara bustled in with her sister in tow, both of them laughing and carrying in grocery bags. Emily had come back into Sara's life three years before, thanks to a lot of digging by Peter and Neal. She had been living in Europe and had been ready for a reconciliation with her little sister. She now lived in Chicago and would come to visit a couple of times a year. Neal looked up as they came in and rushed to greet them, taking some of the bags from them into the kitchen. Hearing Sara laugh with her sister was one of the best things he'd ever heard and he was so thankful he'd been able to contribute to this happy reunion.

By dinnertime, the smells emanating from the kitchen were amazing. Neal had made his famous stuffing and was busy with the garlic mashed potatoes when the doorbell rang and their first guests arrived. It was Peter and Elizabeth, of course, arms full of gifts for their goddaughter and nephew. Neal could hear the commotion in the living room as the gifts were placed under the tree and the laughter he heard warmed his heart. He felt like the luckiest man in the world. He had an amazing wife who he loved more and more every day, two fantastic kids, a great job, friends, a warm, inviting home to come to at the end of the day and a sense of fulfillment he had never thought possible.

They sat at the dining room table and prepared to toast the meal. Diana and Christie had arrived with their two daughters, Olivia and Virginia, Mozzie sat next to Liam, his godson, Peter and Elizabeth sat together, smiling and Sara faced Neal at the other end of the table, sitting next to Emily looking totally like the loving and warm mother she had become over the years. He glanced at the chair to his left, the place had been set but the chair was empty and Neal smiled, sadly. He stood to make the toast.

'This year, Christmas is very bittersweet. We are thankful to share this day with all of you, family and friends but there is a member of our family who is not with us this Christmas' he said, looking at the empty chair to his left

'I know we all miss Grandma June and I know for a fact that she is smiling down on us today and she would not want us to be sad. But we miss her and we remember all those Christmases we spent with her. So I'd like us all to raise a glass to June, an amazing woman and a terrific friend'

Everyone raised their glass 'To June' they said in unison

WCWCWC

Sara was hovering near the front door as Neal brought down the last of the boxes from Hope's room. He winked at her as he walked past, knowing how her heart was torn between happiness for their daughter and sadness at watching her leave.

Hope followed and walked up to her mom.

'Well, I think that's it, Mom' she said, looking into her mother's eyes 'Are you sure, you don't want to drive up with me and Dad?'

'Honey, I think I'll stay here with your brother and spend the last few days with Aunt Emily before she has to go back to Chicago' said Sara, smiling at her daughter

'Okay' said Hope, hugging her mom

'I thought you might want to take this with you' Sara said as she took off a beautiful silk scarf she was wearing. It was Hope's favorite and she tried to 'borrow' it every chance she got.

'Really? But Mom, it's your favorite'

'I would really like _you_ to have it' said Sara, as emotions began to rise in her chest

Neal reappeared in the doorway, witnessing the exchange and trying to keep his emotions in check.

'I have something for you too, sweet pea' he said as he grabbed a box by the basement stairs

'Dad, these are your brushes. You don't even let me use them...'

'Well, I would be _honored_ if you used them while you're away. That way, I can be a part of what you're painting' he added, hugging her

'Oh, Dad, thanks. It means a lot to me. I'll take really good care of them' she said, as her voice broke

Neal nodded, unable to find his voice. He turned to Sara, seeing the emotions in her eyes and hugged her tight. 'I'll be back by Friday, don't worry okay?' he said as he kissed her

Sara stood in the doorway, waving them off, fighting the tears yet knowing this was the most natural thing – to raise your children to the best of your ability and send them off into the world.

As she waved, she hoped she had succeeded in giving her daughter both roots and wings.


End file.
